Yes, 2013 was another year that stretched the credulity of consumers who'd barely stopped shaking their heads at the Bob Diamonds, tax avoiders and Eurozone crises of 2012.
This is Money's team has taken a (very tongue-in-cheek) look at those who emerged from this year's ridiculousness as true winners.
The 3-2-1 Award for best use of a bin
Winner: Halifax
Well done Halifax: This is Money's Richard Browning was impressed by Halifax's use of office furniture.
provincial branch displays a level of efficiency above and beyond the professional norm, it deserves praise.
After sitting with a member of staff who checked my Isa transfer form in detail then signed it off, she threw it in the bin before I had even left the branch. Amazing service. Halifax – best use of a bin 2013.
The Childcatcher Award for services to youth
Winner: George Osborne
Take a bow, son: Mr Osborne has been recognised for his services to both youth AND the elderly this year.
Adam Uren says: With almost a million under-25s still unemployed, naturally that mean old Chancellor felt he needed to pile on the misery. As if they weren't struggling and squeezed enough as they looked for work, these unlucky young souls were then told they'll be toiling away till their 70s to pay for the state pensions of ungrateful retirees already sitting on fattened private pension pots. Still, at least it gives them more time to find a job.
The Gordon Brown Award for services to pensioners
Winner: George Osborne
Adam Uren says: Hurrah for George! While those workshy benefit scroungers idly bemoan their luck while still putting away 20 ciggies a day, our fearless Chancellor is rightly forcing the ungrateful youth to work for longer so that the current crop of grafters approaching retirement can get their hard-earned state pensions at a reasonable age.
The Black Friday Award for best fabricated financial day
Winner: Splurge Sunday
These guys....
But overall winner is ‘Splurge Sunday,’ coined by a voucher website. It said December 8, 2013 was the busiest shopping day of the year – not November 25 as predicted by others.
I had images of a packed store with shoppers running around like headless chickens firing splurge guns as seen in classic 1970s kids’ movie Bugsy Malone. Well done voucher website - just don’t use it ever again or you’ll have to lick custard pies off the floor of John Lewis.
The Price is Right Award
Winner: Vince Cable
Well
done Vince: Marc Shoffman praises the business secretary for his
refusing to budge despite concerns that Royal Mail was criminally
undervalued.
Demand for the stock meant anyone who wanted more than £10,000 was shut out and each investor received £750 each. Not bad for a service likely to be plagued by union strikes and this new form of instant messaging called email.
The Tiny Tim award for financial restraint
Winner: Bosses of the Big Six
Gas bless us, every one
Poor old British Gas said it was a ‘difficult decision’, beleaguered Npower faced a ‘really hard decision’, and the breathtakingly astute EDF said it recognised rises were ‘unwelcome’.
Their outpourings of empathy might have left many cold – were it not for the revelations of the sacrifices the Big Six bosses were making as well.
EDF boss Vincent de Rivaz made do with £1million last year – down from £1.2million to ‘reflect the current economic climate and EDF’s focus on reducing costs’.
Npower’s Paul Massara put up with £600,000 – and will only get his bonus of up to £150,000 if he hits targets for employee and customer satisfaction.
But the real tragedy is British Gas’s Sam Laidlaw who gave up his bonus this year leaving him with a meagre £1million pay packet.
But he was paid £5million last year, which means he still probably has enough to scrape together to build his second swimming pool.
Britain’s cheekiest company 2013
Winner: Bumi
Bumi: They've cracked it
The mining company that works in holes and cracks across Indonesia is on the lookout for more openings following a successful rear guard action by new backers.
Sadly, the company this week voted to change its name to Asia Resource Minerals. We will miss making it the butt of cheap jokes but the fact remains, Bumi is being wiped from history.
The Traffic Lights Award for simple switching
Winner: RBS/Natwest
Life's a glitch
As a result, the decision to switch current accounts to another provider has never been simpler.
Oh, and Natwest also reduced the interest rate for a million of its Isa savers to the equivalent of 'naff all', so the bank can certainly look forward to a Kevin Pietersen-style 'switch hit' from me come Isa season.
Least pleasant customer service experience provider
Winner: South West Trains
Congratulations: Militant public address systems win the award for South West Trains.
Every three seconds at Wimbledon station someone gets told off – via a shouted stream of pre-recorded abuse from the platform PA system.
Crimes include standing in the wrong way, walking in the wrong place, running, owning a bike – even if the bike is locked away at home in a special shed – and, God forbid if you try to use the wrong stairs, door or facial expression.
Being injured is also deemed worthy of a frequent public slagging off. There’s been nine at Wimbledon station in the last year. Clearly, that is NOT ENOUGH!
They interrupt actual useful announcements by shouting about terror threats, security alerts and car bombs. Armed guards tackle people with non-fold-up bikes. And private militia are employed to check that people who arrive at the station only to find all the trains have been cancelled had a ticket they weren’t able to use.
They’re not very good at making trains run on time either. But that’s not their fault, said a manager via his PR last July on a webchat.
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